1 of 1- Goose
- Cogito ergo sum
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Aides Wrestle Drill From Trump As He Tries To Remove Listening Device
Aides Wrestle Drill From Trump’s Hands As He Tries To Remove Obama Listening Device From Skull
WASHINGTON—Rushing toward the president as he pressed the eight-inch bit into his temple, several White House aides managed to wrestle a drill from Donald Trump’s hand Monday while he attempted to remove Obama’s listening device from his skull. “Obama implanted a microphone inside my head to record everything I say!” Trump reportedly shouted shortly before three White House staffers pinned him to the floor and pried apart his fingers to seize the power tool. “You don’t understand, he can hear everything we’re saying! Obama can even hear my thoughts! I have to get it out! I can feel it! I can feel it! I can feel it!”
At press time, staffers were panicking after Trump locked himself in the bathroom and began cutting his stomach open with a razor blade in an attempt to find the tracking chip he said The New York Times had put in his food.
We live in a time in which decent and otherwise sensible people are surrendering too easily to the hectoring of morons or extremists.