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4/03/2018 12:02 pm  #1


Fired Trump Staffers Hold Reunion

HOUSTON (The Borowitz Report)—

Former White House staffers who were fired by Donald Trump held their first reunion on Easter Sunday in Houston’s Astrodome.

The event, which drew a crowd of approximately sixty-five thousand people, had been organized by the recently axed Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson.

“The turnout is just outstanding,” a beaming Tillerson told reporters. “Of course, most of these people didn’t have anything else to do.”

The reunion was a veritable Who’s Who of dismissed Trump staffers, with such luminaries as Anthony Scaramucci, Sean Spicer, H. R. McMaster, Reince Priebus, and Steve Bannon spotted side by side at a make-your-own-taco station.

While the event ran smoothly for the most part, there was one minor hiccup when David Shulkin, the former Secretary of Veterans Affairs, was briefly denied entry until he could prove that he had actually been fired rather than having resigned.

“We made it very clear from the outset that this party was for fired staffers only,” Tillerson said. “But once David walked us through exactly how he got canned we were, like, O.K., you can come in.”

[img]https://media.newyorker.com/photos/5ac23a83a58b5447d4289642/master/w_727,c_limit/Borowitz-Where-Do-Fired-Trump-Staffers-Go.jpg[/img]Photograph by Jochen Tack / Alamy

Last edited by Just Fred (4/03/2018 3:20 pm)

 

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